Quotes from Short Calendar


"He's that guy I told you about." -Amy
"Oh, right. Yeah, that guy with the two girl names. Jackie Suzanne?" -Vincent
"Tracy Carol. I know. I'm trying to get passed the name thing." -Amy

"Can I stop a plane from taking off?" -Amy

"She said I made her sick. If I touched her she'd... I'd find my privates in the front yard." -Andrew Scribner
"Okay." -Amy
"She was an olympic shot-putter, so after awhile I just stopped trying." -Andrew Scribner
"Oh, that was... smart." -Amy

"Lauren, your opinions are not as fascinating as you think they are." -Maxine

"What's anorexia?" -Lauren
"It's a disease women get from reading magazines." -Maxine

"She never met a thought she didn't share." -Maxine

"This isn't gonna work." -Amy
"Good morning." -Maxine
"What were they thinking? Do they let just anyone do this job? I quit." -Amy

"Baby, I'm here to tell you that on the scale of all thing bad and horrible, Mrs. Schleewee is just an annoyance. You'll survive this." -Amy

"That's my mom." -Lauren

"You don't know it yet, but this is the luckiest day of your life." -Amy


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