Quotes from Crime and Puzzlement

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Bruce: I find I lack certain parenting skills.
Amy: Which ones?
Bruce: The ones that allow you to talk on the phone to other parents.
Amy: Oh, yeah, I try to avoid that at all costs.

Amy: I saw you rant. You can't unring that bell.
Bruce: Would you like a list of things I've seen you do?

Kyle: Drug addicts are a pain in the butt.

Kyle: See? We need to eat in our rooms in front of the TV and ignore eachother like normal families.

Amy: Oh, that's what you're advocating? You? My own personal Jiminy Cricket?

Sean: Now are you done?
Maxine: I will never be done, but I am willing to shut up if you have something you would like to say.

Amy: I learned my lesson. I'm never sentencing anyone to show tunes again.
Bruce: When they get to Andrew Lloyd Webber I'm quittin'.

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